Hussain M Elius

We are under attack. Under attack, I tell you, from fleshy forests of crevices by the excruciatingly hip. Sitting on the furthest table in our colleges lounge, my view is constantly punctured by the skin folds of the lower back. Although the so-called fashion itself is not new to me- my mom has been complaining about it for ages- but I really don’t remember myself being constantly mooned back then. I am not square, far from it, but really, is it necessary to show off your butt to the rest of the world?

A quick Googling brings us the story behind this fashion. Apparently, it all started back in the U.S. Prisons (surprise!), where convicts were issued pants, which tended to be several sizes more than the standard. That, combined with belts being banned from the prison (to prevent suicides or from them to be used as a weapon), made pants “sag” down below the waist. Soon, it wormed its way into mainstream through hip-hop artists like Ice-T and Too Short back in the early 90s, were it was adopted by wannabe gangstas thanks to the perceived tough-guy cachet. Several variations of the story exist, with the most popular version claiming showing off buttocks sends a sign to other inmates that the person is ready for an intimate relationship; but we are convinced that our version is correct.

Unlike most fashion statements, this one is pronounced by a physical discomfort. How anyone can walk with pants tied at their knees is beyond me. Some people who sag cite comfort as a reason for following the fashion, but I really don’t see how hobbling in a goofy manner is comfortable. Pants worn in this way are propped up by constant hitching, which becomes an integral part of the walking style of the wearer.

The style, though somehow popular, remains controversial. There has been talk of banning the fashion back in the west (without the fashion police, fortunately), but so far it is only a punishable offence in several small town and states. Perhaps more notably, just prior to the 2008 Presidential Election, the then-candidate Barack Obama appeared on MTV and stated that laws banning the practice of wearing low-slung pants that expose one’s underwear were “a waste of time”. However, he did follow that up with the statement: “Having said that, brothers should pull up their pants. You are walking by your mother, your grandmother, your underwear is showing. What’s wrong with that? Come on. Some people might not want to see your underwear. I’m one of them.” Well Barack me Obama dude, we are with you!

Published in Rising Star, The Daily Star, 01 April 2010